There is a lady I know whose heart is so big that it sometimes causes her pain.
Not due to any enlarged heart, medical type illness, but because she is so sensitive, giving and open to the feelings of others that her heart sometimes goes into overload.
Over the past few years the ladies’ heart had endured many ups and downs.
The lady had found her place in the world. A place where she felt at home, had found a tribe she connected with and a job to do that left her feeling fulfilled. Her heart was full of happiness and a sense of belonging. She genuinely loved others and they genuinely loved her back.
The heart knew the lady was happy because the sound of her laughter could fill a room and her connection with those around her was authentic. Some people even loved hearing her so much that they called her “The Voice!”
As life often does, it threw the lady a big curve ball. She had some very big decisions to make. The heart knew that the lady was struggling with these decisions because sometimes it hurt. When the lady was alone and thinking about what she needed to do for her family, little ripples of pain went through her.
Isn’t it unfair sometimes that when we make a decision that will give the best outcome to others, we lose something within ourselves?
The lady was amazing and she put on her happiest face and used her most convincing voice when she spoke to other people, but she couldn’t fool her heart. The heart was feeling the lady shut down bit by bit.
The lady even started ignoring her heart when it started to feel broken and sad. She made big life changes and tried to see the positive in all situations. The more her heart tried to tell her something, the more the lady shut down and stopped listening.
The heart knew that things would get worse before they got better, so she hung in there and kept beating, knowing with all her might, that the lady would listen to her again one day.
The heart sat back and watched as the lady went through some really hard times. The lady had to step away from using her special gifts, because she knew she was not able to give her energy to others when she needed it all for herself.
The lady tried lots of different things to feel that same sense of connectedness that she had once known, but it was not the same.
The lady knew that something was missing but she didn’t know how to fill the void. She gave so much of herself to others. She welcomed little people into her home, but she knew this was not the answer.
As the lady started to listen to her intuition again, the heart started to feel more alive. The ripples of pain started to lessen and the ripples of happiness returned.
The lady tried again to give life to new beings, but this was not meant to be. The heart knew this was such a shame because the lady was a born nurturer. Maybe as she learnt to nurture herself more her life path would reveal itself.
The lady is braver than she will ever know, more loved than she can imagine and a source of strength to others. The impact she has had on others is immense and she will learn not to underestimate this.
The lady is healing at the moment from an operation, and her heart is healing too. They are both taking the time they need to reflect and ponder.
Never under-estimate the power of a good pondering session. Allow your mind to float gently back over the decisions and directions that have bought you to where you are today. Accept that you can not change anything that has happened in the past, forgive yourself for any situation you wish you would’ve handled differently and most importantly, know that you decide how the future looks.
The lady with the big heart is going to emerge healthier, more grounded and with a stronger sense of self than ever before. She will again listen to her heart and they will work together to be all they need to be.
The big hearted lady will learn to keep a bit of her heart for herself and she will not feel guilty about this. Her need to nurture herself will make her a better nurturer of others.
I love this big hearted lady and I would like nothing more than to be able to take her in my arms and squeeze the absolute shit out of her, but unfortunately I can’t at the moment. As life gets in the way, sometimes we don’t communicate as regularly as I would like, and I will make more effort to rectify this situation.
I want the lady and her big heart to know that they are loved, supported and being sent healing vibes from afar.