Embracing the whiteboard – part 3 – (“The bedroom edition” )

Hi there, I hope you’re well.

Have you been embracing the whiteboard?

Did you “drop” anyone from your team?  Have you used the “votes system” to get the team performing?

Keep using the language of football and encouraging your family with statements like pulling your weight, contributing to the team and work ethic. These words are good reminders that we all have a role to play.

This week is a special edition of embracing the whiteboard and one of my personal favourites.

We will be using the language of football to assist you and your partner in the bedroom!

I know this sounds amazing, but it really works. By implementing a few simple steps, you can use the language of the great game (that may sometimes annoy you) to your benefit.

Over the years I have heard many, many coach’s addresses to their team. I started to notice that there are a number of sayings, clichés and terms, that coaches use. When I began to document and research for this program, I realised that these terms could be applied in other situations.

There are so many double meanings and if you’re willing to be a bit silly and let your dirty mind take control for a while, it can also be quite amusing.

To the untrained eye it may appear that the team is just running around with no real direction or strategy, and on some days, it may feel like this to the coach too!

But what many people don’t realise is that there a number of “set plays” that the team must learn in order to move the ball effectively around the ground. This is often referred to as the game plan.

In this, the third session of “Embracing the Whiteboard”, I will show you how to harness the power of the “football cliché” and the “set play” to spice things up in the bedroom.

I will show you how by carefully choosing the words you use and the way you say them, your “special adult time” will become next level!

For this session, I suggest getting yourself a small whiteboard.

How to use it will be shown in the short instructional video at the end.

 You’re here, let’s get started.

Part 3a-  Football words and terms for bedroom fun!

You may have heard the use of terms in the media or when listening to a coach’s address, and not been sure what they mean. It really doesn’t matter what they mean, we are not using them for their real meaning anyway, what matters is that you can use these words to give your partner some very specific instructions that will be understood with crystal clarity.

There are many words that coaches and the football community have to describe activities that happen on the field. This session I will be listing a number of these words and terms below, but instead of telling you what they mean, I will demonstrate how I would use them.

Watch the short video at the end.

Trust me though, you will get a fair idea of just how erotic the language of football can be if you approach it with a dirty mind.

Football words that can be used in the bedroom-

composure                skills               efficiency                   rotations/rotate

“midfield tap zones”            consistency            “dead pocket”               “advantage area”

ball skills/handling             “push up to the play”                       “up the corridor”

“front and centre”                       “get involved”                     “be accountable”

“cover the exits”       “defend the ball carrier”                 “stay low in wet conditions”

“two hands to the contest”

Read them again, say them in your best sexy voice.

Yes, that’s right, footy is a sexual game.

Part 3a-  Organise some set plays

A coach will have a number of set plays that they will want their players to learn.  The “set play” is a series of movements the team will make when instructed. It is most often seen as players, organising themselves at the kick in and around the centre square when the ball is to be bounced.  There may also be set directions of play that the team needs to follow when moving the ball from one end of the ground to the other. Coaches often have code words for their set plays.

How handy would this be if you and your partner had some “set plays” and “code words” of your own?

At home, this might look like-

Kids are all occupied, one’s asleep, one’s at a friend’s house and one is playing video games with noise reducing head phones on (add or reduce scenarios depending on your number of children).

You catch your partners eye over the piles of washing needing to be folded, you take a few tentative steps towards them, only standing on 3 small pieces of Lego, and you whisper in their ear,

“you have been rotated off the bench (get your arse off that couch), get onto the ground (the bed), you have 5 mins to move up the corridor, staying front and centre, no playing behind the packs! I want you using both hands. Show me your skills and be efficient. I want results!” 

As you train and use the language more you may even have it down to a code word!  

Depending on the ages and genders of your children, your code word could be Frozen or Cars!  It gives you and your partner the opportunity to know what’s about to happen without anyone else knowing. If you ever get the chance that is!! 

Good luck and keep using the language of football as the offseason approaches. Keep practicing and using that whiteboard.

Please watch the short instructional video to see how to implement the strategies we have learnt about today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Embracing the whiteboard – Part 2

Hi there, I hope you’ve had a great few weeks.

Have you been embracing the whiteboard?

Did you practice using the “language of football” to get your team organised?

A quick re-cap of what we covered in the last session –

  • Positions
  • 1%’s (one percenters)
  • Weekly Focus
  • K.P.I.’s (Key Performance Indicators)

Keep using the language and encouraging your family with words like support, back up and follow-up. These are powerful words, they spread positivity and help with team work. Keep using “Coaches Voice” to really get your point across.

This week we will be focussing on encouraging your family to do things for you (and the team)………because they want to.

I know! It’s an amazing concept, but I’ve seen it in action.

During my many years as a student of the game, and as the wife of a player and coach, I have seen people do things that they cannot possibly want to do. Players will perform tasks of unbelievable courage and strength, just because the coach says so.

Or is it?

I’ll let you in on the secret, they do it for their place in the team and votes.

One of the biggest fears of the footballer is being “dropped” (explanation below) and one of the biggest draw cards  is the chance to be best on ground, most courageous, and possibly get a trophy at the end of the year at presentation night.

In this, the second session of “Embracing the Whiteboard”, I will show you how to harness the power of the “being dropped” and the “votes system”, to get things done around your house and to have your family competing for your approval.

Don’t forget to watch the short instructional video that will put all we have learnt into practice and give you a format from which to learn the language.

You’re here, let’s get started.

Part 2a-  Do you want to be dropped?

In the football club environment players are rewarded for holding their spot in the team.  The rewards can be elevated status, higher payments, leadership responsibilities and the respect of the players, and others around the club.  So you can imagine how devastating it is to be dropped.

  • Being dropped – a player may have been playing in the Firsts (the really good ones) for a couple of weeks and then their form starts to slip.  They might stop following the team rules, not playing to their normal level and thinking they can rest on their laurels. After a couple of weeks of the coach trying to discuss their form and offer feedback, nothing changes, this player might be dropped. This means that they will then play in the  two’s (also known as the development side, not as good as the firsts). The player will then need to prove themselves, to regain their spot in the team.

At home this might look like – numerous discussions have been had regarding room cleanliness and the level of help with household chores declining. The child in question may be relying on the fact that they have always done it, to get them through. An opportunity comes up for a fun family outing and unfortunately the child in question is “dropped” for poor performance and will be spending the day at Crazy Aunty Evie’s house. She has no WiFi and there is a strange smell in her house that no-one can identify.

Someone doesn’t have to be dropped each week. If everyone is performing then they hold their spot. But it’s a good thing to have having over their heads. If they drop form, they get dropped.

Part 2b – Embracing the votes system 

In the football club environment the votes are normally read out at the end of the game and in senior football clubs it’s a good draw card to motivate the players and supporters to stay around the club after the game. Good for morale, club culture and the bar takings. By harnessing the power of the votes system at home, you too can lift morale and build a family culture.

The votes system is a great way to increase resilience and to let your family know that not everyone gets a prize, but everyone can give themselves every opportunity to succeed. Although you won’t word it as such, the votes system allows you to have a your children compete to be your “favourite for the week or month”.

  • Votes – Players are awarded votes by the umpires and the coaching staff. Votes are read out at the end of the game. Prizes from local businesses are also attached to the votes. Everyone loves it when the bald guy at the club gets the hairdresser award. Don’t be afraid to inject a bit of humour into your votes.

At home this might look like- me assigning a set of points to various tasks and behaviours around the house. You can give points to many tasks, some of my personal favourites are- cleaning the toilet, folding the washing, walking the dog, cooking dinner, putting the bins out and making my cup of tea just the way I like it. Points are also given for supporting and helping others.

Your decision is final and no negotiation will be entered into.

A tally is kept and at the end of the month (You can do it weekly too),  I read out the votes. Don’t feel bad if you have 2 children and only 1 gets an award. Hello resilience!  Awards are earned not given out willy nilly, someone needs to work a little harder next week.

IMG_3182
White board set up                     (B.O.G. means Best On Ground)

Please watch this short instructional video to see the “Being Dropped” and “Votes” speeches in action.

The next session is a special one!

We will be focussing on using the language of football to get your needs met in the boudoir!! It’s an informative session and good for all skill levels.

 

 

 

 

 

Embracing the whiteboard – life lessons of an experienced football wife.

I believe that all experiences in life are to teach us something or they are preparing us for something great. Maybe it’s our life’s purpose or helping us find our true passion. Whatever the reason I have decided to act on it.

I have made the decision to use my vast knowledge of football to help other women. I have written a four step program (4 quarters) called “Embracing the whiteboard”, to help women, like my past self,  who may be struggling with the all-consuming game.

A bit of background for those who are not familiar with my story-

I started studying the art of football about 26 years ago.  I studied closely and followed the game religiously, I may also have been following a certain young man but that’s beside the point. What I was to come to realise was that being a footballer wasn’t just the weekend hobby I thought it was.

It was all consuming. The training, the game day routine, the superstitions and like a part of society I had never experienced before, a sub culture, it had it’s own language.

Through my program, “Embracing the whiteboard”, I will show you how to incorporate the terms and strategies used by coaches and players, to transform your home life and have your family playing like a premiership team in no time.

I understand the power of language and trust me the language of football is a powerful one. I have spent years researching and living it, so, I know. These words can get a sane man to run out onto a field in the middle of winter, to chase a ball and get it through some sticks, while wearing shorts and a tank top, and being pummelled by other men.

Powerful stuff.

Now you too can harness the power of this language and make it work for you. This program is like de-coding an ancient language and finally understanding the meaning of life.

You will also learn how to use your voice as a powerful tool. By just dropping an octave or two you can illicit a response from your team that you never thought possible.

During the program “Embracing the Whiteboard”, we will look at –

  • Incorporating the whiteboard into daily life
  • Assigning the chores and actually have them get done
  • Making family time a priority
  • Letting your children compete for your love and receive votes
  • Marketing and branding your “Team” for buy in

And my personal favourite –

  • How to incorporate “footy speak” into the bedroom (absolute game changer)

This program will change your life, and if it doesn’t it will give you a laugh and you will have some new words in your vocabulary.

Each session will be accompanied by a short instructional video that will put all we have learnt into practice and give you a format from which to learn the language.

There is no time like the present, you are here now, so let’s get started.

Part 1- Incorporating the whiteboard into daily life 

The whiteboard is an integral part of this program. If you don’t already have one at home you will be making a purchase soon.  If you’ve ever seen a football coach heading out onto the field to address his players he is most likely carrying a whiteboard.  It is covered with lots of little magnets, they have the players names on them.

It’s very important, as the players look to the whiteboard for guidance. They look to the whiteboard to know what is expected of them, where they should be and what they should be doing.

About 8 years ago I developed the whiteboard system at home. I’m here today to share my tips to make the whiteboard the source of truth in your home. You will need –

A white large whiteboard, whiteboard markers and a ruler.

You will rule the whiteboard up giving each family member a column, a column for dates and a column for notes.

Now for the most important part, the language of the whiteboard. You need to know the terms but you also need to understand their meaning and how to use them correctly. Below is a list of terms that you will be using and their meaning-

  • Positions – this tells all team members where they need to be and when. Knowing your position and that of your team mates allows you to offer support and be supported.

At home this look like – Morgan – deb practice – Wednesday night 7pm. The team can then organise who will need to be there to support Morgan by getting her to practice.

  • 1%’s (one percenters) – the small tasks that may not get a lot of recognition but need to be done for the team to win.

At home the 1%’s might be cleaning, putting the bins out or feeding the dog. No glory attached to them but they are essential.

  • Weekly Focus- having a weekly focus lets the team know what takes priority that week. It helps the team prioritise and lets them know why other things may have to be overlooked to meet the focus.

At home it helps have a conversation, “Sorry Paige but you can’t go to that party this Saturday, look at our focus for the week. It’s Morgan’s Deb. The team’s focus takes priority so try again next week.” 

  • K.P.I.’s (Key Performance Indicators) – these are the measures that let the team know what they are working towards in their game plan. These are usually measured quarter by quarter in a game. It shows teams where they may need to apply more pressure or applied focus. eg -tackle count – shows how much pressure they have applied to the opposition.

At home I prefer to measure the KPI’s weekly. I often set them around cleaning chores. One of my favourite KPI’s is toilet cleanliness. If I see a skid mark in any toilet then I know we are not applying enough pressure to the toilet with a brush or toilet cleaner, and it’s an area for improvement.

Please watch this short instructional video to see the Whiteboard Address in action.

**Don’t forget to practice and join us in 2 weeks to learn how to use this empowering language to get your children to compete for your affection, by introducing a votes system. Revolutionary!**